This is generally a light-hearted column, but unlike Trent Alexander-Arnold I like to tackle stuff when it gets a little heavy. So strap in Brent-a-Goblins, it’s time to talk about racism [*dramatic sound effect*].
What’s p*ssed me off more than Steve McManaman on commentary is the fact Rodrigo Bentancur is facing a 12-match ban for an undoubtedly racist, but seemingly unintentionally so, comment about his Tottenham team-mate Son Heung-min.
If you missed it, he made a terrible joke on live telly about how all Koreans look the same. Admittedly, it was dumber than Cole Palmer on University Challenge, but what it certainly wasn’t was egregious enough to justify him sitting on the naughty step for A THIRD of the friggin’ season!
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Bentancur apologised for his "very bad joke", an apology Son accepted, so perhaps the FA should change their approach. The whole ‘taking offence on behalf of the unoffended’ thing is as pointless and regressive as a tactical team talk from Tim Sherwood.
What does a 12-match ban do other than appease the bloodthirsty masses on social media who, like Ireland fans still frothing at the mouth about Declan Rice, care far more about revenge than progress?
The ban, like the contract Chelsea just handed to Nicolas Jackson, is a ridiculous length and probably won’t bear any fruit. The sensible approach would have been to simply pull Bentancur aside, explain his mistake, give him the benefit of the doubt, and save the tarring and feathering for repeat offences.
What do you make of the proposed 12-match ban? Let us know in the comments section below.
Besides, these lapses can befall even the shrillest of virtue-signallers. Case in point: The Guardian newspaper – the paragon of political correctness that it is – used a photo not of Bentancur, but of Cristian Romero when covering the story.
I guess all South Americans look alike to those horrible, homogenising bigots! Throw the book at them, I say! Or maybe, like Ange Postecoglou with his menacing sarcasm, we all just need to chill out a bit. Save the venom for the actual wrong-uns.
Seeing red about not seeing red
Okay, back to the trivial stuff, and where better to begin than with Arsenal? Yes, yes I know, they’re a good side these days. But let’s be honest, their progress-to-silverware ratio is as tragic as Leonardo Di Caprio’s pre-Oscar run.
Anyway, the fact that the Gunners didn’t wear red in the North London Derby on Sunday made me lose my head quicker than Everton lose 2-0 leads.
If there isn’t a colour clash then away kits shouldn’t be worn. Like 95% of Chelsea signings under Todd Boehly there’s absolutely no need for it, unless you’re promoting it to fleece casuals for a bit of cash because you it's too ugly to sell - like a subscription to Sam Allardyce's OnlyFans.
Seriously, shoehorning ill-fitting strips into big matches the way Enzo Maresca has to shoehorn 47 attacking midfielders into the same squad is the money-grubbing b*llocks football should be avoiding like the plague.