Two articles about Son Heung-Min’s press conference ahead of the Qarabag match? Yep. I thought about just doing one long one, but this particular issue deserves its own article, because it’s important.
We all know what Rodrigo Bentancur said in an online video this past summer where he racially abused Son Heung-Min as a “joke,” implying that all South Koreans look the same to him. We also know that he realized his mistake and apologized to Sonny, that Sonny has forgiven him, and that an FA tribunal could still potentially suspend Bentancur for as many as 12 matches for racial discrimination.
What we haven’t really heard yet is a definitive statement from Sonny. Until now. And because this is Son, it’s a statement that is both loving and forgiving towards a teammate he calls his brother.
“At the moment, there’s a process from the FA, that’s why I can’t say much about it. But I love Rodrigo, I love him. I love him. We have a lot of good memories, we started playing together when he joined.
“He apologized straight afterwards when we [were on] holiday. I was at home, I didn’t even realize what was going on. He just sent me a long message, and you could feel it was coming from his heart. When we came back to the training ground for preseason, he was really sorry and he almost cried.
“He apologized in public and personally as well. It felt like he felt was really sorry. We’re all human, we make mistakes, we learn from it. I love Rodrigo, I love him, I love him. He knows he made a mistake but I have no problem at all. We move on as a teammate, as a friend, as a brother. We move on together. We just have to wait what the FA says in the process, I can’t say much. But one thing is I love Rodrigo. So there is nothing more to say.”
I’m of two minds about this statement. The first is just admiration and love for Son Heung-Min, who has endured more than his share of racist abuse from fans and others throughout his career. It must have felt shocking to have something like this come from a teammate and friend. But to forgive so unequivocally is both difficult to do in some situations and also a profoundly human expression, and to hear this incredible statement from Son just feels exactly like something he’d say. It’s expressly clear that he loves Rodrigo Bentacur like a brother, and while forgiveness doesn’t always come easy (even with family!) in this case it sounds like it didn’t take much prompting for Sonny to listen to Bentancur’s apology, forgive him, and move on.
But then there’s the other side of this coin. We’ve talked on here before about how so often the burden of choice between forgiveness or retribution is invariably placed upon the the victims of discrimination. Son in particular has been tasked with carrying the burden of systemic racism against Asian footballers I don’t know how many times. I also don’t know if Sonny feels that way in this case; that’s not a question I can answer and I would never ask it of him.
Here’s what I posted in an earlier article on this issue:
It’s a tricky and incredibly nuanced issue. It’s possible for someone, anyone really, to “do a racism.” That doesn’t always mean the perpetrator is “a racist,” but even careless or accidental racist statements or actions deserve to be called out and consequences levied for what has been said or done.
What is clear is that Sonny has said numerous times over his career in interviews that he has been the victim of systemic and pervasive racism against Asians and others who look like him. Just last year Son was the target of racist abuse from a Crystal Palace supporter, and there has been more than one incident of racist abuse directed at him in matches against West Ham. Back in 2019, in an interview Son admitted that he’s been the target of racist abuse a few times since coming to England, and that the best way to deal with it is just not to react.
I stand by this. I’m both incredibly proud to hear additional context from Son about the issue, about the sincerity of Bentancur’s personal apology to him, and that Son has been so forgiving to his teammate and friend. I also remain angry that Son was placed in this situation to begin with where he once again must shoulder the burden of racist abuse directed at him and be the arbiter of how the situation should be handled.
Does that make sense? I don’t know. I’m a privileged white dude who has never once experienced this kind of discrimination in my life; I’m probably the worst possible person to speak on this issue. But it’s so nuanced that I feel I can hold in my heart both gratitude to Sonny for offering forgiveness, as well as anger that our society is still at a place where that choice is forced upon him.